Posted by Joke at 5:12 PM
Friday, December 10, 2004
Cliffs Notes: The Joke
Hi. My name is Joke Googlia, although fans of obscure films might best know my body of work under the name Bert The Human Tripod. For those of you who are warm weather stalkers, I live in the Fringe O' Paradise (a lovely suburb just outside of Miami), in the world's slowest fixer-upper fixing-upping. Since I require a support mechanism, I live with That Fabulous Babe I Married, our oldest son, Numbah One Son, and our our youngest son, Numbah Two Son. Given that our work schedules remind most sentient beings of a certain age of the film Ladyhawke, the odds for a Numbah Three Son are very damned slim indeed.
Given the aforesaid schedule, which has each of us (the parents, at any rate) working Very Opposite busy seasons, I get to play Stay At Home Dad for about half of the school year. The other half of the school year I am a financial wizard on par with Peter Lynch, JP Morgan and Meyer Lansky. The work part, other than producing some medically interesting side-effects any moment now, isn't so much fun to blog about or, I'm guessing, read. The SAHD part is, because I am allowed entry into the world of moms. Moms are interesting, fascinating creatures, especially if they forget you don't have fallopian tubes.
Although the work stuff is dull as a cue ball, in order to achieve this lofty status which requires near-constant worry, I had to do the MBA thing. Which isn't so damned interesting in and of itself, but! it sure makes you look at life very differently. Also that's where I met and wooed (in that order) TFBIM who is both a nurse (RN) and accountant (CPA). I had to lay on the charm kind of thick to get a hottie such as her to marry me, or more correctly, be charming enough to keep her narcolepsy from kicking in, that I may engage in proper courtship.
So we got married and had the two boys, and moved to the lovely house and made lovely friends, and put the lovely NOS in a lovely Catholic school (because we're hardcore Papist-types) and then had to deal with the lovely NTS's mild autism (or, as NOS called it when he was little, "oddtism" and I think the lad is on to something) which he seems to enjoy most of the time, but vexes the rest of us. But he is making progress and we are fully confident of the Pinocchio Scenario coming to pass soon with perseverance, prayer, generous applications of cash and no thanks to the gummint or the insurance companies.
The purpose of this blog is, frankly, to charm the world.
When I am not obsessing over work or children, I enjoy vexing my wife by making friends I have not met in real life, I also enjoy vintage Italian sports cars, wine, food, working out (see how it all ties together?), home theater stuff, having long protracted discussions over design and decor with TFBIM, blogging, wine, emailing, MST3K, Real Beer, vintage film, ardent spirits, bespoke apparel for gentlemen, anachronistic Catholicism, driving quite fast and often on race tracks, Gilbert & Sullivan, British humor, books on etiquette, the beach, New Wave/surfabilly/rockabilly/blues, the Marx Brothers, fountain pens, P. G. Wodehouse, really nice stationery, Alfa Romeo cars, Harry Potter, wearing one of my several black tie combinations, watches, cocktail shakers, operetta, Buster Keaton, opera, and cocktails. That's just off the top of my head.
Oh, I cannot type.
Posted by Joke at 8:01 AM