Chemical traces of good news.

OK.

This is possibly the smallest and least consequential sort of good news, but in these trying times of death, pestilence, global cooling, war, famine, celebrity marriages breaking up, people whom we dislike getting elected by acclamation, socialism, and artificial fibers...we need all the good news we can scrape together.

Now, if you live anywhere nearish a major urban area, you are likely subjected to a Free and Hip Urban Newspaper. This newspaper, for the most part, prints nothing (to quote PGW) "but the most frightful bilge" and carries very artsy looking advertisements for shops the prime wares of which seem to be made of black leather or are battery operated and the general size and shape of a parking meter. You know the newspaper I'm talking about.

But these newspapers have one saving grace, they generally have far better reviews than the Real Newspaper. Their reviewers, for some reason, are more exhaustive, more adventuruous, more foodie and more "real" than their mainstream counterparts. Perhaps wedging yourself inside black cabretta crinolines and lugging around a cylindrical something powered by 84 D-cell batteries (the operation of which is calibrated with Herr Richter's scale) fosters quite an appetite. I don't know. All I do know is they have serious restaurant reviews and these are close to infallible.

So!

Imagine my delight when their annual review compendium leers at me from the free dispensing machine. I snatch it eagerly and beging to fumble for the restaurant listings. There it is, under Best Sushi, "my" Japanese restaurant. The one where I/we am/are invariably the only Caucasians. The one where the menu is entirely in Japanese and where asking for a menu in English results in nothing save a 30 minute delay. The one where asking for a California roll might actually get you ejected or decapitated. The one where seating yourself at the bar means you will get, without addition or subtraction, exactly (and only) what the sushi chef wants to give you. That one.

Awarded "Best Sushi" in one of the largest metropolitan areas of the USA. Not 5 minutes from my house! Yeehah!

So, I'm happy. Happy-ish.

-J.

Comments

blackbird said…
GTK, as we say, here in Tuvalu (Good To Know), in the event we are ever in your neck of the woods.
Our local sushi place makes a special soup for K and always puts aside some fish cheek for him...(have I mentioned he produced Japanese commercials for 5 years?)
Badger said…
Wait a minute, how is this good news? Now everyone knows about it, and your favorite local joint will be overrun with the unwashed sushi-seeking masses! That's BAD NEWS, dude. VERY BAD NEWS.
Joke said…
The unwashed sushi-seeking masses will likely flee as if their hair was aflame once they see there's no California Roll, and that the menu is entirely in Japanese and that the entire clientele (except us) are Japanese.

Or, at least, that's my hope.

-J.
Caro said…
Badger makes sense.

Your restaurant sounds like a dim sum restaurant we went to in the Bay Area.

Only chopsticks were laid out, no forks. If I asked the waiter for a fork, he would repeat back "fork", but never bring one to the table.

The good news is that I can now eat with chopsticks.

So did you order anything with batteries from the magazine? ;)
MsCellania said…
You have such good food there in The South of New York City.
Do they serve you egg first? And I bet you offer the chef a drink of his choice. Because you're all proper like that.
Joke said…
Because we don't want a Yanagiba sticking out of my throat.

-J.
MsCellania said…
Hey, where's that knife post of yours? I've about had it with the Henckels and Wusthofs.
MsCellania said…
Thanks.
Bookmarked

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