Sunday, May 07, 2006

Stress.

This is the most stressful time of the year. Summer is nearly upon us and we haven't planned JACK. So I have spent the last few days online looking up things. When we can use our miles, the hotels are ready to eviscerate the wallet, when the hotels are reasonable, the airlines want quintuple miles and have weird schedules and ridiculous layovers.

To top it off, TFBIM and I have never seen eye to eye on travel. For example, this year she wanted to go see the Grand Canyon. For 10 days. Stop and think about this. My wife wants to spend 10 days looking at a multicolored, striped gouge in the earth. She wants us to do hiking and riding the mules. Those of you who've met us, can you see NTS hiking for hours? In Arizona? In SUMMER? Me either.

Y'all can stop laughing now.

Now, we do have friends in Phoenix and I suggested that we stay at a frou-frou hotel and spa there, because in summer...Phoenix is practically free since it's 934F (388C) during summer and even passing bedouins complain about the weather. "Oy, it's like a sauner in heah." "Dry this heat is? Feh." The shopping is good, the food is good, we have dear friends to visit and it's damned near free. And we could take a day trip to look at a multicolored, striped gouge in the earth. (Remember that scene in National Lampoon's Vacation? Yeah, I'm like that.)

Of course, this was considered a ludicrous suggestion.

We had planned the Italy thing. In fact, I had even managed to score a great "pensione" across the street from the Vatican which is in a 300-year old building and even has it's own caffé/trattoria on the ground floor and a pizzeria two doors away. For $88/night. Only that if we want to do this with FF miles, um, "you can't get there from here" but we can pay $1K per person.

Oh, and I found a ridiculously impractical (well, not TOO...it has 4 seats and a/c) car to buy in Italy, where it's less popular--i.e., cheaper--than here to drive around.

This bears thinking.

-J.

Posted by Joke at 12:08 PM

10 Comments

  • Blogger perceptive reader posted at 3:06 PM, May 07, 2006  
    Perhaps you could combine the Grand Canyon with Las Vegas, Yosemite. A friend just completed that trip and there was something for everyone. Two nights at the GC is enough but you are probably way too late to stay at the north rim.
  • Blogger MsCellania posted at 7:01 PM, May 07, 2006  
    Is that an Alpha? It sort of reminds me of a 1974 BMW csi that I had for a few years. That sucka hauled tail. And cost $400 a momth in Back Then $$$ to keep on the road *sigh* Which is why I drive Japanese vehicles now.

    I can tell you youngest would totally dig Yosemite. There is violent water and stuff going on. All The Time. If he's clumsy, there are a few things I would NOT take him on, like over a thermal, roiling, boiling, conduit to the center of the earth. But tons of stuff to see, and lots of quiet inbetween.

    What about the Biltmore? Isn't that in Phoenix? What about Canyon Ranch in Tucson. That's nice. Don't know about the chilluns, though... Actually, there are great mountains east of Phoenix that would be great to stay in. I'm thinking Phoenix could have possibilities for you.

    How about renting an RV and driving around? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    My sister (yes, the naive one; the pilot) lives in Las Vegas. I can tell you there is not alot for children to do there, but they will become completely famililiar with the female anatomy just walking down the strip! Male anatomy, too. The overdeveloped kind.

    And why do you have to GO someplace? Aren't there Camp Gitchigoomee's there in Miama? We've got our guys signed up for 2 full days a week for the entire summer at a local rec center's kiddy day camp. They are fine with youngest's behavior issues. He will be in a different class than oldest, but have oldest in the proximity.

    Everyone I know is freaking out right now about summer. And with the price of av fuel, flights are only going to get more expensive. *sigh*
  • Blogger Badger posted at 7:10 PM, May 07, 2006  
    I can highly recommend central Texas as a vacation destination, especially if your idea of a vacation is sitting on a deck drinking a pitcher of sangria or margaritas or something while the sun sets spectacularly over the lake.

    But, you know, I'm sort of biased.
  • Blogger Poppy Buxom posted at 8:30 PM, May 07, 2006  
    Don't forget you've already been invited to the New Hampshire seacoast to eat lobstuh.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 8:01 AM, May 08, 2006  
    Poppy, but that's a trip, not a vacation. You know I have my strange definitions.

    -J.
  • Blogger blackbird posted at 8:38 AM, May 08, 2006  
    - wait.
    To BUY? in Italy? and drive whilst there and then? ship it home?
    I just want to get the facts.

    As for the vacation, the GC is best viewed from a plane, as far as I'm concerned.
    Why not Tuscany? A house with a pool...
  • Blogger julia posted at 10:06 AM, May 08, 2006  
    Well, I'm with you on the National Lampoon thing - "See, kids? The Grand Canyon. Let's go." No desire to spend any time there, let alone get on a MULE and ride around. Yeah, um. No. Italy. And that car is fabulous.


    I didn't know bedouins talked like a cross between Yoda and Mel Brooks....
  • Blogger Joke posted at 12:25 PM, May 08, 2006  
    I picked that up watching the Bedouin Channel on Dish Network.

    -J.
  • Blogger Poppy Buxom posted at 12:45 AM, May 09, 2006  
    I don't get it. What is the difference between a trip and a vacation?

    I mean, come on. No one's expecting you to cook. Because no one is going to believe that you know how to cook lobster. Or at least, no one is going to think you're going to be better at it than the people at the lobster pound.

    So the bad news is that I'm puzzled.

    The good news is that the word verification is an actual word, sort of. It's "hanki," which is much easier to type in than the usual "qwrucionph"
  • Blogger Joke posted at 1:02 PM, May 09, 2006  
    A vacation is when you go somewhere to relax and not do anything. Not see sights, not absorb great culture, not engage your brain on anything beyond shopping, flopping on a hammock, and pondering soothing beverages and dining options.

    A trip is quite the opposite, except for the dining part...and a little of the shopping part.

    -J.
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