Oh, what the Hell. Me too.
A nice, BRAND NEW paperclip. Made of high-tensile strength 4340 stainless steel, with knurled undersides, it is ideal for grasping securely multiple sheets of paper without -- get this -- perforating them. The high malleability of this aerospace-grade steel item makes it possible to grasp multiple papers and also allows to be reshaped to its original configuration. This is because the clip has been forged to approximate shape and then, after cryogenic and repeated heat-treatment phases to reach optimal grain orientation, it's machined to its final shape, stress-relieved, shot-peened and magnafluxed.
Furthermore, it has been coated with a flexible, moistureproof layer of polyvinyl chloride, in a vivid red, This way the paperclip may never rust AND the reams of papers (you'll be using this little beauty a LOT) you've affixed securely therewith may be easily located. It can be yours just for posting your email address in this combox.