Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Dunno about the universe...

...but I think I've pissed off two galaxies and a constellation.

This morning, exactly at the midpoint of the school run...my car ran out of gas. My choices were call the tow truck people (wait 1-2 hours for arrival), all of us walk 1 mile home get another car and start over, all of us walk 1 mile to school in extremely heavy rush-hour traffic over non-pedestrian friendly thoroughfares.

Sophie's was easier.

It is my policy -- as an adherent of the "A happy wife is a happy life" philosophy -- to not burden my beloved with these trivial facts as, during these troubled and stressful times, she tends to Not Handle It Well. The problem with this comes when she manages to find out. And then, when confronted, I have to tell her the reason I withheld these details is because she doesn't handle them well.

Which she didn't handle well.

So that was that.

-J.

Posted by Joke at 1:02 PM

17 Comments

  • Blogger Frogdancer posted at 3:36 PM, March 11, 2008  
    ..laughed at your first sentence.

    I've never run out of petrol (touch wood.) It's one of the things I dread ever happening, because I'm the only driver in our house (seeing as the others are mere children) and if the petrol thing ever happened it would be totally my own fault.

    I don't think I could live with the shame and heartache....
  • Blogger Badger posted at 5:50 PM, March 11, 2008  
    Do those fancy Eye-talian sportscars you favor not have gas gauges on them anywhere? Or what? Because I'm failing to see how running out of gas is not your fault. (You still get time served for illnesses and whatnot, though.)
  • Blogger Joke posted at 6:17 PM, March 11, 2008  
    There is an issue with the fuel gauge fuse.

    Which IS my fault.

    Still, a day of no small suckitude.

    -J.
  • Blogger BabelBabe posted at 7:43 PM, March 11, 2008  
    sophie only had 2 options, so count yourself lucky.

    and i am with badger, dear man - sorry.
  • Blogger Stomper Girl posted at 9:20 PM, March 11, 2008  
    You should 'fess up to TFBYM or give your kids better training in secret-keeping. Mine ALWAYS rat on Fixit. The first thing they said when they got back from Boys Weekend Away was we stayed up till 9 o'clock.
  • Blogger crafty posted at 9:39 PM, March 11, 2008  
    She may not handle it well, but what you fail to understand is you have a choice between TFYBIM (?) not handling it well, and not handling it even worse because you withheld information.

    My husband withheld for 6 months that the fire brigade was called to the house he was visiting because he had left one of the children asleep in it. The truth will eventually reveal itself.

    Ha ha, the word verification is
    u iz dum.
  • Blogger crafty posted at 9:41 PM, March 11, 2008  
    Oops, called to the house he had left the car parked in front of, with sleeping child in the car.

    hooizdumnow?
  • Blogger Poppy Buxom posted at 11:47 PM, March 11, 2008  
    I ran out of gas once while driving the kids to the city--literally right in front of a gas station. My husband's only words were: "You are your father's daughter."

    So maybe he and TFBYM aren't a perfect match after all.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 11:53 PM, March 11, 2008  
    Had I run out of gas in front of a gas station -- there is one of those stories in the draft pile -- things would have eveolved differently.

    The point which I spectacularly failed to make is that TFBIM was particularly set off by my telling her I withheld information because she handles it poorly.

    Kind of how Islamofascists get upset when they are characterized as violent and then, to show their displeasure at being called thus, go off on a rampage of riots and explosions.

    But I made all her favorite foods and plied her with wine and her mood softened.

    -J.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 11:53 PM, March 11, 2008  
    P.S. I got the gas gauge fuse working.
  • Blogger bluemountainsmary posted at 2:26 AM, March 12, 2008  
    A declining fuel guage makes me nervous.

    Thus I admit that I will never know the pain of which you speak.

    Although Joke really and truly I could not believe you would tell your wife why you could not tell her.
  • Blogger shula posted at 3:03 AM, March 12, 2008  
    Oh pshaw!

    Nothing you can't fix with a bottle opener and a medium rare.

    Consider, perhaps, substituting want she can't handle with what you could bear to bother her with, giving her general state of Extreme Business.

    Isn't that what being a SAHD is all about?
  • Blogger My float posted at 6:57 AM, March 12, 2008  
    Oh dear LORD you have a lot to learn about women. First rule: keep your mouth closed. The issue isn't that the kids sold you out, the issue is that you sold yourself out.

    There's a very good reason why silence is considered golden.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 2:30 PM, March 12, 2008  
    Even *I* am not entirely free of utter lapses in in good sense.

    -J.
  • OpenID olivespearls posted at 4:34 PM, March 12, 2008  
    LOL! No sympathy here. You broke marital commandment #1: thou shalt not hold up the mirror.
  • Blogger MsCellania posted at 4:59 PM, March 12, 2008  
    They have new-fangled devices called gas gauges that work wonders on the running out of gas problem.
    Oh, I see that the FUSE was in need of repair.
    Never mind.
    It's tax time. This all makes sense.
    What did you fix her for dinner? I called my husband yesterday and made him come home from 2 time zones away. I told him I was having chest pains but neglected to finish the sentence that I reckoned it was pleurisy. (Which it is according to bloodwork and x-rays) So while he's glad I'm not dead, he is a bit miffed that I didn't use better identifiers. So I'm thinking I better cook a pretty good dinner tonight, pleurisy and all...
    Yes, and what was the wine, too, come to think of it?
  • Blogger Poppy Buxom posted at 12:45 AM, March 16, 2008  
    Heh heh. He said "Islamofascist."
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