The Hate List
(Shamelessly pilfered--in concept, not content--from the estimable Badger.)
* White Zinfandel (it's not wine...Hell, I'm not even sure it's a beverage)
* Disco...this one is pretty visceral
* Liver (and offal, while we're at it)
* Artificial fibers
* Totalitarians
* Boot-cut, pegged or flared trousers
* Browned Down Red (don't ask)
* Mass market white bread
* Stupid-ass, numbnuts lawsuits
* Diet drinks
* American Fucking Idol, and the sorts of music that winners therefrom inflict on humanity
* That idiot in the Prius who flipped me off for having a car strictly for pleasure
* Conspiracy theorists
* The texture of coconut
* Regular coffee (maybe it'd taste like something if 75% of the water was missing)
* The 1970s (aptly called "that ghetto of a decade")
* Star Trek and all its permutations
* Seattle grunge music
* Modernism
* Cancer (I mean, duh)
* People who titter at their own unfunny remarks
* Taxes (I would have thrown all that tea in Bahstahn Hahbah all by myself)
* Olives (TFBIM is in charge of those)
* Overprocessed hair
* Reality TV
* Drinks with pornographic names (the Flaming G-Spot, Orgasmic Walrus, whatever)
* Chick flicks & chick lit (Do NOT get me started, especially those "Beaches" type things)
* Academy Award injustices
* Atonal music
* Cosmo magazine
* The bed-head look
* People who consider irony the height of...whatever the Hell, like I care
* Repeating myself (this is in a class by itself)
* Neo-urban hipsterness
* Breast implants
* Near-criminal stupidity
* Modern German composers
* Women who sling around the term "Girlfriend" or "Diva"
* Hair implants or, worse, hairpieces
* Male sales associates who keep saying "uber"
* People who overcomplicate things
* People whose parenting styles come strictly from manuals
* Traffic jams
* Automatic transmissions
* Waiting
* Anything which inconveniences or impedes my forward progress
More as my bile rises...
* White Zinfandel (it's not wine...Hell, I'm not even sure it's a beverage)
* Disco...this one is pretty visceral
* Liver (and offal, while we're at it)
* Artificial fibers
* Totalitarians
* Boot-cut, pegged or flared trousers
* Browned Down Red (don't ask)
* Mass market white bread
* Stupid-ass, numbnuts lawsuits
* Diet drinks
* American Fucking Idol, and the sorts of music that winners therefrom inflict on humanity
* That idiot in the Prius who flipped me off for having a car strictly for pleasure
* Conspiracy theorists
* The texture of coconut
* Regular coffee (maybe it'd taste like something if 75% of the water was missing)
* The 1970s (aptly called "that ghetto of a decade")
* Star Trek and all its permutations
* Seattle grunge music
* Modernism
* Cancer (I mean, duh)
* People who titter at their own unfunny remarks
* Taxes (I would have thrown all that tea in Bahstahn Hahbah all by myself)
* Olives (TFBIM is in charge of those)
* Overprocessed hair
* Reality TV
* Drinks with pornographic names (the Flaming G-Spot, Orgasmic Walrus, whatever)
* Chick flicks & chick lit (Do NOT get me started, especially those "Beaches" type things)
* Academy Award injustices
* Atonal music
* Cosmo magazine
* The bed-head look
* People who consider irony the height of...whatever the Hell, like I care
* Repeating myself (this is in a class by itself)
* Neo-urban hipsterness
* Breast implants
* Near-criminal stupidity
* Modern German composers
* Women who sling around the term "Girlfriend" or "Diva"
* Hair implants or, worse, hairpieces
* Male sales associates who keep saying "uber"
* People who overcomplicate things
* People whose parenting styles come strictly from manuals
* Traffic jams
* Automatic transmissions
* Waiting
* Anything which inconveniences or impedes my forward progress
More as my bile rises...
Comments
Browned-down red has NEVER worked for me, incidentally. Color me disappointed.
--P.
That is SO VERY not you. Maybe if you wanted to come across as your evil twin. (An evil twin without a mirror or sense of self, at hat.)