Wednesday, March 22, 2006

The Girl I Married

Dear Internet,

Let the record show I am thoroughly in love with my wife.

This, however, doesn't mean she's incapable of driving me nuts. She doesn't have One Massive Flaw. She has several little ones. (Which, to tell the truth, is only fair, as I have plenty.)

One of these is an uncanny ability to spot the cloud in every silver lining.

Example, you ask? Sure!

I got a call yesterday from one of my best clients to the effect that in May (i.e., after the end of Tax Season) the project I'd start up would end up being a good deal larger than anticipated. Not more work, mind you...but it'd be a bigger deal. This is a very good thing.

So, I innocently decide to share the news with my lovely and gracious wife. She congratulated me on the good news...then she paused...and uttered:

1- The taxes are going to be terrible on this.
2- We won't be able to do anything with this because we need a new roof, one (possibly two) new bathrooms and a new kitchen.
3- The boys will grow up as spoiled, snotty little rich be played by James Spader in the John Hughes film.

I told her to cease and desist with the negativity or I'll buy a Ferrari.


Posted by Joke at 1:13 PM


  • Blogger Gina posted at 1:31 PM, March 22, 2006  
    Remind her of how much chicks dig James Spader.
  • Blogger MsCellania posted at 2:16 PM, March 22, 2006  
    Regarding comments 1, 2 and 3: Seems selfless and totally spot on to me!
  • Blogger Joke posted at 2:55 PM, March 22, 2006  

    Yeah. That will comfort the mom who cried when she realized that at his next birthday NOS will have lived half the life he will live with us before he goes to college.

  • Blogger Bec of the Ladies Lounge posted at 3:34 PM, March 22, 2006  
    sounds like my dad:

    Phone call #1
    "Beautiful day down here dad, how is it up there?"

    "Oh lovely, sunny, not too hot, garden's looking great [pause] - it will all be dead by next week if we don't get some rain."

    Phone call #2

    "Is it raining up there too, dad?"

    "Yes, lovely rain, really soaking into the garden [pause] - of course the drains will back up and the ceiling will be mildewed before you know it."

    I thought the weather examples were more tasteful than his approach to his health...

    good luck with that big deal!
  • Blogger Joke posted at 4:50 PM, March 22, 2006  

    I think I have committed some horrific Freudian faux pas. Instead of having "married my mother" I've married your dad.

  • Blogger blackbird posted at 5:39 PM, March 22, 2006  
    interesting...K's spring project has become somewhat more substantial as well, though, sadly, it does involve more work...
    and, I believe, he is purchasing a car. though not a ferrari.
  • Blogger BabelBabe posted at 6:01 PM, March 22, 2006  
    at least james spader dressed well...
  • Blogger Joke posted at 9:09 PM, March 22, 2006  
    I'm not even remotely close to deciding on buying a Ferrari, but the Perennial Worrier TFBIM doesn't need to know that.

  • Blogger Gigolo Kitty posted at 9:15 PM, March 22, 2006  
    Shouldn't it be Jake Gyllenhaal? James Spader is a bit over the hill, isn't he?
  • Blogger Badger posted at 10:38 PM, March 22, 2006  
    Yabbut I don't think Jake Gyllenhaaaaaaal was even born yet back when John Hughes was doing his thing.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 8:07 AM, March 23, 2006  
    Badge is right.

    Besides, James Spader not only played (well) the snotty rich kids, he also played them as intelligent, something of which I have a great deal of difficulty seeing in Jake Gyllenhaal being capable.

  • Blogger Poppy Buxom posted at 10:08 PM, March 23, 2006  
    Why don't you tell TFBYM that until tax day, 2007, you'll stow the monies, which ordinarily you'd use to augment her jewelery collection, in tax-free municipal bonds.

    I'm sure that will thrill her to pieces, her being a C.P.A. and all.
  • Blogger Joke posted at 3:24 AM, March 25, 2006  

    You are a dangerously wise person.

  • Blogger Suse posted at 6:18 PM, March 26, 2006  
    Isn't James Spader the one with the creepy looking lips?
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